2. She has so many books in her classroom library that they wouldn't have to build one named after her.
3. She's always right. Always.
4. The White House would always smell like Yankee Candle's 'fresh linnen', and Bath & Body Work's 'moonlight path'.
5. She would allow American citizens to open their Christmas presents on Christmas eve.
6. She'll instigate a new education reform called:
"Thank Whatever God You Serve That I Ain't Your Momma."
7. She once told George Lucas that she refused to pay two million dollars to use a Star Wars clip in a commercial she was filming at the time because, "You see, I don't pay."
He didn't make her pay.
8. She would win every presidential debate with one single argument: "Excuse me, I'm the mom. I don't have to explain myself." And it would be a damn good argument every time.
9. The Vice President would either be Kenney Chesney, or David Letterman.
10. I've always wanted to see if the press would dub me "First Ginger".
Because she would spank them, but it would only ever have to happen once.
Because she's never wrong.
Because she made her commercial.
Because that's just How It Is